I owe my dad $7,000. He loaned me $12,000 back in 2003 for a down payment on my condo. I paid him back $5,000 over the first two years, but more recently I've chosen to put extra money toward debt that charges interest and has a regular payment. So it's been about three years since I made a payment.
My most recent plan was to pay off my final higher-interest (8.99%) debt and then focus all my energies on paying my dad off. He's never asked for a payment or displayed any need or urgency, but I feel compelled to make good on this as soon as I can.
My 8.99% loan is now at $14,000. It looks like, with AS's layoff, general economic instability and baby plans in the future, I won't be able to pay extra on it much longer. If I pay the minimum on the debt, I'll pay it off in 28 months. That's over two years before I'd start paying my dad...
I was going to pay an extra $1,000 to my 8.99% debt this month, and then stop paying extra until things have stabilized. But I am starting to think I should give that $1,000 to my dad. I won't be able to pay him the remaining amount anytime soon unless I take out another debt to do so; this may be my last chance to give him any part of it for awhile. It doesn't make financial sense, but does it make enough emotional sense that I should do it?
Musings
December 5th, 2008 at 05:25 pm
December 5th, 2008 at 05:42 pm 1228498974
I think the important thing is to talk to him about your intention to pay him back, that you have not forgotten. Maybe compromise and give him $500 and $500 extra to the 8.99% account. You may also be surprised that your dad will tell you not to worry about it for the moment.
December 5th, 2008 at 05:58 pm 1228499939
After that is done, I would have a heart to heart with your father. Be honest with him where this is on the priority in your household, be honest in how it is eating you up, be honest how you have grown in the last year.
I hope that helps. Good luck.
December 5th, 2008 at 06:50 pm 1228503038
If it were me I'd make an effort to pay my dad what I could now.
December 5th, 2008 at 07:08 pm 1228504112
December 5th, 2008 at 08:09 pm 1228507795
December 5th, 2008 at 09:53 pm 1228514037
Tijdzhania: You know, no one really asks about my setup on this site, I think because I'm so focused on the financial aspect of everything in all my blog posts. And I'm thrilled about that, because I know we have such a mix of backgrounds and beliefs on this site, yet we all coexist peacefully for the purpose of sharing our money advice and helping one another with our personal finances, and it's really opened my mind to the generosity of heart that people from many walks of life can have for one another. However, I decided when I started this blog that I wasn't going to hide the fact that I have an unusual household. If you're interested in knowing more about how it works, I wrote a guest post on another site in January:
http://www.queercents.com/2008/01/28/financial-complexities-of-a-troupled-household/. As for how we stay in sync, I think we're just lucky to have a good mix of temperaments and talents.
PS: I really admire the Dutch attitude from what I've encountered in my brief international travels. Very cool and laissez-faire.
December 6th, 2008 at 09:10 am 1228554609
I agree about the Dutch laissez-faire attitude, wish it would take on elsewhere ;-)
December 7th, 2008 at 06:10 am 1228630246