1. Don't be in such a hurry.
When my girlfriend's education financing fell through due to various issues, I stumbled bravely into the fray wielding my meager credit history and no idea about finances. I took out unsecured personal loans and borrowed money against my credit cards. I was so afraid that if she couldn't go back to school in the fall, she'd never be able to. In retrospect, I should have asked her to take a job and save money for a year while we looked at our options. Those well-intentioned debts were the first few shovelfuls of the huge hole we dug ourselves into. When you're 24 and in love, take a few deep breaths before getting into something you don't understand, moneywise anyway.
2. Be moderate and reasonable, and do what you can.
This goes in two directions: Of course one was buying things I couldn't really afford, but in the other direction, I would get into really stingy periods where I tried desperately to get out of debt by cutting out all pleasures and even some basic necessities. This would lead to getting fed up from no fun and not enough progress, and making some wild splurges that would erase my progress so that I felt I had to go into extreme privation again. I think it was similar to the battle some face with food and their weight, only mine was with money. Had I tried going steadily, only paying off a little debt or even just aiming to break even at times, I think I would have gone into less debt overall.
3. Savers aren't all Scrooges, and a frugal life doesn't have to be miserable.
The two main people who talked about money were co-workers of mine. One was dead-set on getting debt-free, the other was debt-free and dead-set on saving money. Unfortunately, they were both grim girls who constantly (and vocally) resented that they didn't make more money. They were ungenerous of spirit as well as money, so I came to think the two went hand in hand. They made being frugal seem to me like a grim death-march, so it seemed a worse fate than being in debt. Had I known that frugal people could be upbeat and even fun, I might have tried harder. In other words, one of the main things I wish I'd known when I was in my twenties was the community of savingadvice.com (or MisersMisersMisers.com, as my girlfriend affectionately calls it)!
Things I wish I had known when I was in my 20s
December 19th, 2007 at 03:30 pm
December 19th, 2007 at 04:37 pm 1198082271
December 19th, 2007 at 04:44 pm 1198082673
December 19th, 2007 at 05:35 pm 1198085721
For us it's the $2.50 movie matinee and library stops -that's our treats. If I go without movies and books I do get all scroogesh and sad face deprived!
Kiss that girlfriend under the misteltoe and often. Now that just might be a wise Christmas purchase!
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you!
December 19th, 2007 at 05:52 pm 1198086749
I too having the tendency to go "All-Out" when I set my mind to something. (I mean, seriously, ever wondered how I came up with my alias?
So, I try to approach it as a incremental lifestyle changes, taking my time to make these life changes permanent.
Again, thank you for writing out these important points about frugality.
December 19th, 2007 at 08:38 pm 1198096694
December 19th, 2007 at 10:00 pm 1198101614
Likewise, someone who is very negative and gloomy would probably remain that way even if they came into a lot of money.
You know what they say, all those people who become millionnaires by winning the lottery don't necessarily become any more 'happier' than they were before.
December 19th, 2007 at 10:24 pm 1198103046
After all, it was my frugal friend that came to the rescue when I couldn't afford to go home for Christmas one year (one of my other friends tattled on me because I wouldn't tell her knowing she would come to my rescue).
It was a very happy day when I bought her plane ticket to Scotland as repayment for her generosity over the years, especially since she was poor at that time from attending college herself.