I've pretty much gone on a spending diet for the past month and a half, after the spending spree that was March (aka birthday) month, and upon the prospect of the land deal kicking our new-home dreams into high gear. Ever since the prospect of that money was dangled in front of me, I've felt more determined to be able to achieve what I would with the money, whether or not I get it.
So not only has my family cut travel and charity out of our budget, but once I'd made up for my overspending of my personal money in March, I continued to minimize my discretionary purchases. I put in for wine every third week for the family, and I've accepted the occasional lunch or dinner invitation out. But other things I want, such as new clothes, more makeup, date nights, have just been put indefinitely on hold. I figure if I'm very good with my money for the next few months, I may be able to fund our hosting of NT's mom and sister in August without having to dip into funds that would otherwise go toward home savings.
Maybe it's the spending diet I'm on, or maybe it's just speculating about what will be next for our family once we're settled in our long-term home. But I've realized over the past month or so -- I'm still a spender deep down.
Not spending for spending's sake; but there are many things I think about and want to purchase, and would do so if I didn't feel like there were more pressing financial matters.
So at present, my view of the future (at least my ideal, though I know there are lots of variables not under my control) would be to buy the home and have enough in the budget to:
- increase retirement contributions (still need to figure out what we should be contributing but it's more than we do now)
- steadily rebuild the EF and medical fund
- pay off the remaining student loan debt at least a bit faster than the minimum
- pay the new mortgage at a pace so it would at least be paid off by the time I'm 65 (which would be 24 years from right now), whether that means a 15-year mortgage or just making extra payments every month
Those are my main priorities, and I would want to address all of them first. But if we had enough income where all of those were being addressed to a level I felt comfortable with, I know what I'd want to do with the remaining money: Spend it.
I've got such a long list, and I know AS and NT have held back on many of their own wants for a long time (there's only so much you can do with $80 apiece per week, even though it sounds like a lot). My wants that have not been fully satisfied for a while, in no particular order:
- Home decor/home improvement
- Wardrobe (clothes, shoes, accessories) and makeup
- Travel
- Eating out
- Good quality wine
- Gourmet cooking ingredients
- Larger-scale philanthropy
- Going to shows (movies, standup, plays)
- Vacation home (pie in the sky and not very high priority)
Things that are not on my wants list (or very low on it):
- Vehicles (car, scooter, motorcycle, RV, etc.)
- Tech stuff (as long as I have something functional and nice in each category; TV, computer, phone, etc.)
It's hard to think of things I DON'T want, I guess because I don't dwell on them! Let's see, guns, country club memberships, horses/riding, plastic surgery ... I'm sure there are other luxuries that are so far off my radar that I couldn't even come up with them after sitting here for 10 minutes staring off into space! 
So I guess what I'm saying is, I haven't really changed the core of me that likes certain things that cost money, and I've even added things to the wants list that weren't there before I started our debt journey. But I never again want to be the kind of spender that leaves my future self in the lurch. I've experienced picking up the pieces after myself for the past 7 years, and it's a lesson learned that I'll never ever forget.
Still a spender at heart
May 17th, 2014 at 09:58 pm
May 18th, 2014 at 12:06 am 1400371598
I hope it's ok to mention that only the possibility of an unexpected windfall accelerated the plan to sell the condo. If you're going to updates/upgrades the condo, why not enjoy those benefits? Will the pressure exerted to squeeze out $ 48K from earnings have potential to damage relationships down the road? After this difficult winter, enjoy the summer.
May 18th, 2014 at 05:11 am 1400389894
May 18th, 2014 at 05:33 am 1400391181
snafu, thank you for your concern! I promise I won't push myself to the point of feeling deprived. Right now a house is my biggest "want" (because it is, really; this condo is functional enough to satisfy our needs), but if I really start to feel a craving for a particular luxury, I'll treat myself to it. Right now it does just feel like a temporary diet; a certain amount of restraint is required to keep it going, but it's made easier knowing it's only until I achieve a certain goal.
May 18th, 2014 at 10:13 am 1400408027
May 19th, 2014 at 12:35 am 1400459728
BA - My list would not include guns either. Though my boyfriends would.