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My mom

October 30th, 2018 at 08:00 am

The past few days have been hard. My mom went into the ER with chest pain (and just gradually feeling worse over the past couple weeks; regular doctors and specialists unable to pinpoint the problem).

Her heart rate was super low and she had several infections in various parts of her body. There were some scary points where a temporary pacemaker wasn't working, where they were debating whether to do surgery before they got rid of some of the infections.

But yesterday she had pacemaker surgery, today she's off oxygen and catheter, and the infections are coming under control. If she continues to pull through she'll likely have to go to a rehab facility before going home, which is good, because after her heart attack a few years ago she totally ignored the physical therapy exercises recommended. If she's at a place, they'll make her do something.

I'm in MN and she's in VA, so all of this has been communicated by email, calls and texts. My dad is stressed and burdened by all the decisions and insurance things he's having to handle, but he had two of my sisters around to help somewhat. One went home and another came, so he still has two there.

I was holding off booking a trip until I heard whether I needed to get there right away, but now it seems like it might be nicer to come in a week when she's probably going to be better able to enjoy a visitor. So I'm going to research flights for early November. I have an extremely busy month (all cancelable if there's an emergency) so I'm looking at a three- or four-day window next week as my best bet for a non-emergency visit.

Luckily we have vacation funds stored up that we don't really have plans for, so if I make this trip and still need to run out another time if anything goes wrong, it shouldn't put a financial burden on my household.

Everyone is being supportive including my work. I know things are touch and go still, but I'm enjoying the feeling of relief after the surgery even if it turns out to be premature. The mind and body can use this respite. It was a few days of -- I don't even know what to call it. The feeling of my mom in danger and my dad suffering mentally was like this ocean of raw emotion right under the surface 24/7. As long as I stayed busy and around people it stayed under control, but it was always there, every second, even when I was laughing and having fun. So to have the ocean subside a bit, even if temporary, is a good sensation.

7 Responses to “My mom”

  1. laura Says:


    Prayers for your mom and dad. Sounds like things are looking better tho, hope that is the trend.

  2. CB in the City Says:

    I hope your mother continues to improve. I know it's hard. ((Hugs))

  3. creditcardfree Says:

    It's hard to be away from family when they are ill. My daughter only had a sprained ankle last week and I felt bad I couldn't be there. I hope things continue in a positive direction for your mother's health.

  4. Carol Says:

    ((Hugs)) and best wishes for good outcomes to you and your family.

  5. Laura S. Says:

    Best wishes for your mom's continued recovery and for your dad as well. Be sure and take care of yourself too!

  6. MonkeyMama Says:

    ((Hugs)) I hope you have a nice trip and your mom recovers well.


  7. Dido Says:

    I'm so sorry to hear about your mother's health problems and glad that it seems that she is through the worst and that you will get a chance to visit. Prayers she continues on an upward track!

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