(or gave, or heard of someone getting or giving)

I was pretty excited about the birthday gifts to my dad and mom this year.

My dad, who has coached girls' softball as well as helped run leagues for decades, decided to sponsor a team this past year. He didn't think they'd put his name on the shirts the way they do a business, so he was kind of embarrassed when he found out they did. But he was wearing the shirt this summer when we visited: "The BD Comets" it said, splashed across his chest. [Not his real name, but you get the idea.] It was comical but also endearing, because I love his commitment to girls' sports, even after all his daughters and even granddaughters grew out of playing softball. I asked him to send me one of the shirts, and when he did, he also sent ones for NT, AS and little AA.

So for his birthday, when we got our friend to do a photo shoot, we brought along the shirts and all posed together in them. I ordered a print of that shot and framed it to send to my dad. Total surprise. He loved it and wrote that he thought AA looked pretty tough and would probably be a great softball player.

My mom loves to write "snail mail" letters, so I wanted to do a stationery for her this year. I finally found a site that would let you design photo stationery (it was kind of hard to find, and not cheap, but once I had my heart set on it I would pay just about anything). I put her name and address at the top, and under her name, "#1 Grandma." At the bottom of the paper, I put a little picture of AA's face cropped from a picture my friend took at the same photo shoot, and under that I put "#12 Grandkid." Then on impulse I ordered envelopes, with her name and address in the return address spot, and the full picture of AA on the other side in a little box in the corner. She should get it by early next week, and I'm hoping to get a thank-you letter on the stationery so I can see it in person! This is something that ended up costing me a lot for the convenience, but with a bit of work and some computer skills, you could probably make a similar gift for pretty cheap.

All the memorable gifts I can think of have a personalized touch. Of course there are the huge gifts, such the early inheritance my dad gave us last year, or electronics, vacations, jewelry, etc. But the ones that make me smile with remembrance are the ones where someone put more thought and effort than money into them.

One of the best gifts I got as a kid was from my best friend at the time. I was really into writing fiction, so she gave me a basket with a bunch of little jars. Each jar had a herb or spice in it and a label, like "rose hips to help you write love scenes." I can't remember exactly what they were, but each spice corresponded with a type of scene or genre. There was also a candle in a jar so that I could "write scary stories in the dark" or something. I kept that gift on prominent display for years and years in my room. It was so thoughtful and playful that I just loved to look at it and think that someone had taken the time to make it for me.

NT, AS and I usually try to do gifts like this, though the past year has been so busy with work, school and baby that we've slacked off a bit on that and just bought one another things. But NT once had a friend make a short film starring him for our Valentine's gift; AS made me a beautiful framed heart out of egg cartons that I still have in my cubicle; and AS and I made an activity book of games like crosswords, word searches and connect-the-dots for NT that we wrote or made, all having to do with him, us or our relationship. Those are just a few examples of many personalized gifts over the years.

The very best gift I've ever heard of was from my sister to my mom. My mom sends birthday cards to just about everyone she's ever met. She keeps all their addresses in this book organized by date, and every couple of days she goes through and makes out cards to the people whose birthdays are coming up. One year my sister MA snuck the book out and made a copy of it and then returned it before my mom noticed. MA wrote a letter and sent it to every single address in the book; it said something like "If you're getting this, you've probably received a birthday card from my mom GL every year. She loves sending cards and doesn't expect anything in return. But I thought it would be a fun surprise if she got a huge number this year. So if you've ever been touched to receive a card from GL, please take a moment and send her one for her birthday this year."

About a week before her birthday, my mom started getting a trickle of cards, many from people who didn't usually send her one. She was pleasantly surprised, then, as her birthday came closer and the trickle turned into a flood, overwhelmed with delight. At some point my sister told her what she'd done, so it wouldn't be some big mystery why it was happening all of a sudden. My mom kept all the cards hanging up, lining the walls of the living room, for months. She was so pleased both by my sister's thoughtfulness and the kindness of so many acquaintances.

OK, I could ramble on for ages, but I would love to exchange ideas here, so we all have some inspiration for when we want to do something extra special for a loved one. And, it's a vaguely finance-related topic, because sometimes the best gifts don't cost much at all. (OK, my recent ones to my parents weren't cheap, but they CAN be, depending on what the gift is and how you go about it.)

So, what's the best or most memorable gift you ever gave, received or heard about?